Quick! How do you perform the Heimlich Maneuver on yourself?!

Well, that was scary.  I’ve had a hiatal hernia for about 12yrs now, brought on through some intense workouts, that’s been pretty uneventful until the past couple of years.  Basically, every once in a while I’ll eat something that just gets stuck somewhere. 

Not quite sure where, all I know is that I get these hiccups that are very strong and pressure that makes it difficult to to catch my breath.  Standing up and stretching usually does the trick, along with a glass of water.

Except today.  Natch, dying wasn’t on my calendar for this afternoon either.

After taking 2 bites of a pork chop Jacinda had cooked for MyCookingShow.tv, I got that familiar feeling again.  Not thinking much of it, I dutifully stood up to stretch and then went about reading some email.  But then the hiccups started.  And I couldn’t catch my breath.  This was not business as usual.  Yikes.

I tried what my coach used to tell me, “walking it off” for some reason imbedded in the male brain I thought it would help.  Instead, I was not upstairs hiccupping and my vision slowly darkening.  “Golly, I’m going to pass out!,” went through my mind (yes, I did think “Golly”).  Wanting a witness, I made it downstairs to the family room where Jacinda was.  She was kind enough to get off the phone when she saw me climb over the back of the sofa, in a vain attempt to get upside down and somehow get whatever was obstructed out of me.  Do all guys go all MacGyver on their own body like this? 

It didn’t help, and by this time Jacinda was asking questions like “Are you okay?”  “What’s wrong?”  “Do you need me to call an ambulance?”  “What’s the code to the wall safe?”  I tried to act cool, but was seriously having a hard time.  I was lying on the floor, not sure what to do and unable to answer her.  No fooling, it wasn’t looking good (but by now you know I made it right?)

Getting back to my feet, I make it to the bathroom sink and had the weirdest experience that didn’t begin the night before at a Mexican Restaurant and include the statement “Sure, why not?!” somewhere during the festivities.  Hovering there, I gasped out “hit me on my back” like a baby needing to burp, it was all I could think of.  I’ll spare the gory details, but after about 1 minute or so I cleared up & out. 

It’s funny how euphoria hits you in a moment like that.  I started laughing.  Seriously.  Was that not the raddest thing ever?!  LOL Oh my gosh that was scary.  Jacinda’s life literally flashed before my eyes (it’s much more exciting than mine).

So, I’m going to stop procrastinating and schedule that GI Doc appointment.  I’ve learned my lesson on this one.

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One Reply to “Quick! How do you perform the Heimlich Maneuver on yourself?!”

  1. Well that was quite the story. Glad you survived and will make that doctor appointment to avoid future issues.

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